So there she was, my supposed hook-up. Although she was not totally airbrushed, you could tell that she had spent hours painting herself up like an Indian on the warpath. Although I had put on my best duds, you could tell that she thought of me as a geek, which I am. Well, after getting our bearings we kind of dug each other, and started making out and had a go at the good old tonsil hockey right in the movie theater. But when I wanted to get to 2nd base, she pulled the old limp act, letting me know that the show was over. Well, after akward exchanges of fake promises, we split with no hard feelings.  I my opinion she was thinking of herself as some drop-dead-gorgous maneater that was to good for me. Well, I my opinion she was not girlfriend material either.

hook-up = date, often arranged by a third party

airbrushed = perfectly styled

painted up like an Indian = excessive use of cosmetics

duds = clothes

geek = socially challenged person

to get one´s bearings = to check something out

to dig something = like

to make out, play tonsil hockey = kissing including tongue

2nd base = male exploration of female body including breasts

limp act = passive aggressive reation of a woman in the face of male sexual overeagerness

drop-dead-gorgeous = very attractive

maneater = woman with many lovers

girl friend material = potential long-term partner for a relationship

In the United States, a woman or a man providing the ideal requirements for enterning into matrimony, is considered marriage material. Although this is supposedly a good thing, especially at a young age, it is nor necessarily so. Many young people do not want to content themselves with going through life, only having had one partner. They want to look back to their youth like a gunman counting the notches on his pistol-butt.

So people considered marriage material will only be turned to and found as attractive in an advanced, more mature period of young people’s life.

To find out if you are marriage material, check out this link.

It is not easy to get in contact with the opposite sex. Although nowadays women are very emancipated, in many cases men still have to do the legwork and the courting. Here are three approaches that, for the sake of successful courtship, should best be banned from your vocabulary altogether:

• Wow, for your age you look really great!
• I find your crowfeet really sexy.
• You know, I like your personality, beauty is not so important for me.

Most of you already know, that especially Americans make a bad habit out of shortening almost anything to an acronym, only comprehensible for insiders. Two examples are YEO and YOYO, both of which, leave the user pretty much on his own.

YEO is for the classic James Bond fan and, therefore, very secretive, i.e. Your Eyes Only

YOYO is more for the dispassionate couch potato looking for not too exerting physical activity = You´re On Your Own

Eine Kundin von mir hat das englische breakfast kurzerhand zum deutschen Brechfest gemacht.
Das ist zwar sehr originell, trifft aber die Bedeutung des Wortes leider nicht einmal entfernt.
Das englische Wort breakfast hat seinen Ursprung in den englischen Wörtern to fast = fasten und to break = brechen, also wörtlich: Fastenbrechen, hat also nichts mit Bulimie oder dergleichen zu tun und bedeutet auf Deutsch: Frühstück.

Police officers are not stupid. At least they get psychological training. In order to make you feel guilty beforehand and make you  spell out it  yourself, they always ask you what legal transgression you might have committed. Don´t buy into their scheme. Here are three standards that will put a lid on any overzealous law enforcer.

Police officer: Can you imagine why I stopped you?

Answer:

• because I have more horse power than you?
• because I graduated from high school, and don´t have to wear a uniform to feel self-confident?
• because you ran out of doughnuts and you´re on depression induced by low blood sugar ?

vocab tips:   legal transgression = Gesetzeswidrigkeit, overzealous = übereifrig, to put lid on someone = jemanden zum Schweigen bringen

George best at his best: George Best was not only a talented soccer player, but also a gifted wordsmith. If you think the title is strong medicine, brace yourself for the clip:

vocabulary tip: squander = verprassen, verschwenden

Knowing a language perfectly with respect to grammar and pronunciation is no guarantee to blend in with the natives unnoticed. A language is not only pure means of communication, but also expresses the speakers cultural background and mindset.

According to from which country your dialog partner comes from, he does not only want to get his message through, but also wants to communicate his personality. English as the world´s communication tool No. 1, in the meantime, reminds me of the Babel Fish, responsible for many intercultural Tsunamis, its users not being aware of the fact that knowing the language alone, does often not suffice.

The Germans famous for beer and cars, are also notorious for their direct way of communication.
While a Spaniard would require a pretext of half an hour, why you would not want to meet up for a beer, a German would just say “NO” and considering “I don´t have time“ enough reason for this harsh turn down.

In order no to be offended, keep in mind that the Germans love efficiency. While for a Brit it is not enough just to get his message through and fritters half a day away in small talk and unsubstantial banter, your standard issue Fritz loves to gets his things done and does not feel the need not be forcefully witty and to apologize for rejection. Neither does he take it personally when the tables are turned on him in this respect.

What can freshen up an international meeting more than a Germans direct negativity and straightforward questions that make all participants squirm with embarrasment? It´s like a shock therapy and make even the most entrechend opponents losen up.

Some of the questions you might be facing in a job interview could be below the waistline:

Q1:Which of the problems with your former boss was the most difficult to handle?

• A1: There were so many, I don´t really remember.
• A2: I have a problem with work in general.
• A3: What´s your problem?

Q2: Tell me about a time when you had fun at work.

• A1: When I was on vacation.
• A2: When the boss was on vacation.
• A3: When the boss was on a sick leave.

Q3: What is your biggest weakness?

• A1: Why is everybody against me?
• A2: I´m too sensitive, please stop asking me such nasty questions.
• A3: I´m weak in general.

Die Briten sind für ihr fair-play bekannt, und um im interkulturellen Spiel sauber zu bleiben, ist es vielleicht nützlich zu wissen, dass ein Homonym (gleichausgesprochens Wort mit anderer Schreibung) von fair eine ganz andere Bedeutung hat, und so im globlen Dorf für Verwirrung sorgen kann. Fare heisst nämlich Gebühr und wird ihm Bezug auf des Entgelt benützt, das beispielsweise für die Benutzung eines öffentlichen Verkehrsmittel erhoben wird.

Also Vorsicht: bus fare hat nichts mit politisch korrektem Verhalten im öffentlichen Personenverkehr zu tun, sondern bedeutet schlicht und einfach Busgebühr. Was aber nicht bedeutet, dass Sie Grandma Miller bei ihrer Busfahrt in London nicht trotzdem den Sitzplatz überlassen können.